Navigating the complexities of the English language often leads us to phrases that seem simple but hold significant grammatical weight. The term “by their self” exists in a fascinating gray area, frequently encountered in casual speech and writing, yet it treads closely on the edge of grammatical correctness. Understanding when to use this variation and when to opt for the standard alternative is crucial for clear and professional communication.
The Standard Construction: "By Themselves"
In traditional grammar, the reflexive pronoun for the third-person plural they is "themselves." This form is the established standard for referring back to a plural antecedent. When you want to indicate that a group performs an action independently or returns to a collective state, "by themselves" is the correct choice. This construction is universally accepted in formal writing, academic work, and professional settings, ensuring clarity and adherence to linguistic conventions that your audience will instantly recognize.
When "By Their Self" Appears
You might encounter "by their self" in specific contexts where it attempts to singularly refer to a non-binary individual or a person whose gender is unspecified. While the singular "they" is widely accepted, the reflexive form "themselves" is still the grammatically complete choice for a singular antecedent. The phrase "by their self" is generally considered non-standard or colloquial, often used in dialects or informal speech where grammatical precision is relaxed. It can also appear in literary dialogue to authentically capture a specific character's voice or regional accent.
The Nuance of Independence
The core meaning behind the phrase revolves around independence and autonomy. Whether referring to a group or an individual, the idea is that the action is done without external assistance. "The team finished the project by themselves" clearly communicates that no outside help was involved. This emphasis on self-reliance is powerful in both narrative and instructional contexts, highlighting the subject's capability and determination to achieve a goal without intervention.
Professional reports should always utilize "by themselves" to maintain a high standard of credibility.
Academic writing demands strict adherence to standard pronoun agreement, requiring "themselves" for plural subjects.
Creative writing may intentionally use "by their self" to reflect a specific dialect or to add texture to a character's dialogue.
Everyday conversation is more flexible, allowing for the informal version to slip in without causing confusion.
Grammatical Precision Matters
While language evolves, maintaining grammatical precision remains a hallmark of strong communication. Choosing the correct form demonstrates attention to detail and respect for your audience. If your goal is to persuade, inform, or publish work that will be scrutinized, opting for the traditional structure is the safest and most effective path. It eliminates the risk of your message being overshadowed by perceived carelessness in language use.
The Evolution of Language
It is important to acknowledge that language is a living entity, constantly shifting and adapting to cultural usage. The visibility of non-binary individuals has spurred discussions about pronoun flexibility, and you may see the singular "they" used with increasing frequency. However, the reflexive form for this singular usage remains "themself" for some and "themselves" for many. The variant "by their self" currently sits in a space of informal evolution rather than established grammatical rule, making it a choice best reserved for specific artistic or conversational purposes rather than formal documentation.
Conclusion on Usage
To communicate with authority and clarity, understanding the distinction between "by their self" and "by themselves" is essential. Reserve the standard plural reflexive for professional and formal scenarios to ensure your writing is polished and correct. While the singular usage continues to develop, sticking to "themselves" or "themself" is currently the most accepted practice. Only diverge from the norm when you are intentionally crafting dialogue or text where the specific phrasing serves a deliberate artistic or cultural purpose.
